Author Archives: Elizabeth

Welcome Spring! A Sunday workshop in Norwich

Ah, a sunny day, at last. Crocuses are daring to lift their heads again and the snowdrops are trembling in the breeze. Spring, if not quite here, isn’t far away.

And to celebrate it, I’ll be running a Sunday morning workshop, with Rachel Cross of Calm In the City  on 25th March, from 10am – 1pm, at The Yoga Tree in Norwich. All details above.

This will be a chance to have a creative morning, exploring your hopes and desires for Spring and Summer, using meditations and yoga with Rachel, and inspiring exercises from me.

We’ll be conjuring up our dreams, and getting busy with scissors and glue to make a mini vision board to remind us of our intentions for the new season.

It’s a small group, so please book early, either by contacting Rachel via the details above, or by emailing me using the Contact Form on this site.

 

Reinventing Retirement [video]

CLICK HERE FOR DETAILS OF HOW TO BOOK YOUR PLACE ON REINVENTING RETIREMENT

Brilliant – I have managed to complete one of my resolutions for this year in the nick of time! I’ve been wanting to add video to Beyond 60 ever since it was born, but the challenge has been considerable.

To be honest, it took 6 months to purchase a tripod, and another two (and some help) to work out how to open and adjust it. Then it was a plunge into the mysteries of iMovie, and from there YouTube, clicking and cursing my way to getting the darned thing edited and uploaded. Machines and I do not get on…

Not to mention the whole business of recording a video – those moments gazing in horror at my first efforts – do I really look like that? Sound like that?

Seems I do, and as there is never any point in going for perfection, so this rendering will hit the spot just fine.

Welcome to my little video. I hope you’ll enjoy all 1 minute and 5 seconds of it, and if you’re in or near Norwich, you’ll be interested in coming on Reinventing Retirement, which is going to be a whole LOT of fun! If you’re tempted, do book now, as 19 January is not far away…

CLICK FOR FULL DETAILS OF HOW TO BOOK YOUR PLACE ON REINVENTING RETIREMENT. 

 

Reinventing Retirement

Isn’t it time that retirement was reinvented? The very word, ‘retirement’, has such echoes of stepping out of the mainstream of life, into the slippers of decline.

I’ve never wanted to define myself as retired,  and tell people that I’m ‘on open-ended sabbatical’.  Sounds like more fun, eh?

So many people I’ve talked to lately are mulling over their options for life with less work. Stop completely? Carry on part-time? Do something else that looks like work? Or looks nothing like work? Go on a jag of volunteering? Invent a totally new way of being? Bits of all the above?

It’s confusing, interesting, exciting!

The question underlying all that mulling, is this: Who will I become, when I’m no longer Working Me?

This 6-part course sets out to explore that question, and many more.

Starting on Friday 19 January 2018 we’ll meet monthly at the Yoga Tree in Norwich to play with ideas, using all sorts of ways into and around the big questions that come with this new phase of life that is so, so full of potential.

Intrigued? Then please, join us. I’d love to see you there. All details are on the flyer above.

The Power of Empowerment

I had a beautiful experience of being empowered today.

I’d been grappling with an app, trying to design a flyer. Patience is not my strong suit and before long I was ready to chuck the phone out of the window and burst into tears.

Then I remembered that someone I know uses this app, so I asked her for help.

What she did was put the phone in my hand and talk me through how the app works, letting me click and swipe to make it all happen.

‘It takes a few moments…’ she said, when I wailed ‘it isn’t working…’

‘Don’t be afraid of it…’ she added, when my finger was hovering anxiously over the screen.

At the end she said, ‘Ok, now do everything we just did and design me a flyer with black lettering that says Autumn Happiness, and save it to Facebook’.

Gulp. But I did it, as she watched, and reminded and finally applauded!

What she didn’t do through all this was make me feel incompetent or stupid. She didn’t show me what to do, she guided me to do it for myself. She stayed patient and calm.

Result, I felt empowered and excited, with a new skill under my belt. And a lesson learned, in how to best help anyone in future who ever wants to learn from me.

Flyer design, anyone? Let me help you…

 

What Is Your Next Big Thing?

That’s my question today, to you and to myself. What is the next big thing?

Early Morning Influences

I’m inspired to ask this, by two influences that have crossed my path already today, and it’s not even 11am!

First, was finishing Birdcage Walk, the final novel of that most poetic and insightful of writers, Helen Dunmore, who died earlier this year aged just 64.

The book focuses on what a person leaves behind, and asks what traces remain of an individual lifetime?

I read it, not realising that Dunmore was already ill without knowing it when she wrote the book, and afterwards thought it no coincidence that her subconscious had directed her towards this topic. A dark shadow was building in her body, that her mind was aware of before it became obvious in her body.

As a much-admired poet and novelist, Dunmore could look at her legacy of words. Yet she also knew that even the written word can fade away after time.

The book is named after Birdcage Walk, a path through a derelict cemetery in Bristol, where she lived, and where all traces of the people buried there had disappeared into clouds of wild flowers and undergrowth. And that, she suggests in the afterword of her book, is where we are all headed.

Sounds depressing perhaps, but instead I found it inspiring.

I believe that we all end up as part of the rich humus of human existence, indistinguishable from each other. But before that, there’s an opportunity, for creativity, for life – to be part of what Dunmore calls ‘the eagerly living’.

You Don’t Have to be Young!

With this at the top of my mind, I turned on the radio to find a wonderful programme called The Gamble, part of a series about risk and creativity.

The singer Laura Mvula was talking about pushing herself, feeling fear, singing at the top of her range, unaccompanied, from the balcony in the London Barbican. She spoke with beguiling honesty about her desire to extend herself, even though it can be terrifying.

She asked herself: ‘What’s the next big thing?’

As I heard the question, I felt a thrill, but then my pragmatic mind chimed in.

‘She’s young! She’s got time for lots of Big Things. You, Elizabeth, are the same age as Helen Dunmore was when she died. New Big Things are not for you.’

For a moment I believed myself. But then Older Me, who’s never far away, struck up:

‘That is ridiculous! You’re not done until you’re dead. If you want a Big Thing, or a Small one, then you go get it, you hear?’

And so I leave you with the question.

What is the next Big Thing for you? What can set your heart alight, give you a delicious thrill down the spine, make you want to leap out of bed in the morning?

I don’t know the answer to my own question just yet. I’m going to live it, and see what responses appear. This blog’s in there somewhere. It’s exciting! Thanks Helen, for inspiring me with your words. I’m grateful.

“It’s About Time…” workshop in Norwich

I’ve succumbed to an overwhelming yen to stretch my life coaching muscles again, having deliberately left them unexercised for a couple of years while I played around with – shall I use that difficult word ‘retirement’?

No. My ‘open-ended sabbatical’. That’s more like it.

The result, for all my lovely followers who live in Norfolk/Norwich, is a joint workshop that my friend Rachel of Calm in the City and I have hatched up for the autumn.

It’s About Time… is a 3-hour workshop taking place on Sunday 5 November from 10am – 1pm at The Yoga Tree in All Saints Green, Norwich.

All details are on the flyer above, or on Rachel’s site at Calm in the City, where you can also book.

We came up with the idea because we thought it would be really fun to work together, and combine Rachel’s expertise in yoga and meditation with my life coaching knowledge to create a relaxing and productive Sunday morning’s experience.

Come along, and explore what it is you’d love to be doing, but somehow never find time for. What’s getting in your way? What are the tiny steps you could take right now to bring more excitement, satisfaction and joy into your life?

We’ll be looking at these questions as Rachel guides us through yoga poses and meditations chosen to help with self-reflection and strengthen resolve while I set the group up with a series of thought-provoking discussion/reflection sessions in pairs and small groups. You’ll come away with a clear idea of what action you’re going to take – and you’ll have had fun along the way!

See here for more details or email me.

Reflections on One Year of Blogging

Blogging after 60

Reading my own blog is so surprising

Twelve months ago, Beyond 60 was born. What an interesting year it’s been.

Blogging Changes You

Who knew, that blogging changes your mind, and your life, in such subtle and delightful ways? Not me.

All small happenings and observations suddenly become potential blog posts.

A happy interlude in the garden, 10 minutes spent gazing into the cat’s luminous green eyes, frustration at the never-ending To Do list, a chance remark heard on the radio – it’s fodder.

I can while away hours composing trenchant and witty posts in my head (where, where?) – ah well, most of them don’t quite get written, but they do hang around, and gently nudge my thoughts and actions in refreshing new directions.

Getting Results

As far as numbers go, think small. A couple of posts a month. A handful of followers (not just my kith and kin). A few thrilling upward blips in the traffic stats, when a post was shared on Facebook and the hordes arrived…and left again.

It’s all good. I know that people read, because people comment. I have a feeling of an embryonic community.

Did I Really Write This?

Choosing topics has turned out to be a gut thing. On a day when there’s a chance to write, it’s whichever nebulous idea floats to the forefront that makes it to the page.

Oddly, when I look back it’s as if someone else wrote the posts. A wise person, who does interesting things and seldom upsets anyone, or herself. I’d like to be her, but it’ll take a while.

The most fun and the least predicted bit has been gravitating from pretty photos, to illustrating with a pin woman who lives in a collaged house. For someone who failed O-level Art at school, this is truly wonderful. Pin lady is out of proportion, wonky and hard to fathom, but she does the job and I just love spending time on her.

Feedback Good and Not So Good

What do people think of my blog? Immodestly, I might quote some praise (hell, why not): Love this gentle, beautiful and vivid description of your day. Thank you, kind reader.

Ruefully, let me share the views of the thumbs-downers: I don’t like this kind of thing and I probably won’t read it again. That is telling me. How about this:  It’s very ‘I-orientated’ isn’t it…?

Yes, it is. But if I can’t write as ‘I’ at 60+ then when, oh when?

My gremlins have enjoyed inflicting massive attacks of self-doubt ‘Joan Bakewell wouldn’t like your blog, it isn’t political enough. Do you know nothing of current affairs, Lightweight?’ ‘Virginia Woolf would be underwhelmed.’  ‘The woman over the road will think you’re daft.’ And so on. Fortunately, I am going deaf.

It has taken TIME in shedloads and has been a work in itself to stay clear of the ‘Should’s’ – you should post weekly, ok fortnightly, monthly, regularly. Fact is, I can’t. Posting whenever has to be good enough.

Though it hasn’t turned out like I thought, it has brought me a whole lot of satisfaction and great new people, not just those who follow Beyond 60, but those who’ve read and commented on my guest posts for Margaret Manning’s remarkable Sixty and Me.

Happy Birthday, Beyond 60!

A blog is a project, and a baby, and a creative work. It needs time, thought, polish, love. And more time.

I’m setting a few birthday desires for Year 2 of Beyond 60.

Be briefer
Be funnier
Keep on with pin lady
No self-flagellation please
Remember poet Mary Oliver’s profound advice: Things take the time they take. Don’t worry.

Don’t you just love that?

It’s in that spirit I wish my beauteous blog, Beyond 60, a very Happy Birthday, and offer it the gift of doing the best I can do to help it grow, using whatever time and energy I have available, no more, no less.

Dear blog, continue to flourish.

The Constant Round of Arrivals and Departures

One thing that seems to define this stage of life is the constant round of arrivals and departures.

Just over the last couple of days I’ve said au revoir to an offspring setting out from home for the next stage of his yoing adult life. Bid a final farewell,  at the funeral of a friend who seemed securely there on the periphery of my life, yet is suddenly gone. Begun knitting for a baby expected in my extended family.

People come and they go all the time, but somehow I didn’t notice or feel the ebb and flow so acutely before.

I’ve become much more aware of the seasons these days, both in the trees and in life.

Let the Feelings In

How to cope with the flood of emotions that arise at each greeting and each farewell? It’s always a joy when someone close comes back for a while, and a wrench when they leave. But this is life.

There is no escaping. Might as well set up home on Waterloo station.

I think the only thing to do is in embrace it. Show the love when they’re here. Have those deep conversations. Stop being afraid of saying the things that matter.

And do my best to let go of fear, that old existential gremlin who sits on my shoulder muttering :Maybe they won’t come back. Maybe this is the last time you’ll see them (insert evil cackle). 

It’s obvious that living in the present moment as much as possible is the only way to manage this. Watching the seasons up close is a good way in.

I’m going down the garden right now to have a closer look at those berries that are starting to flush red, the big brown spiders that have shown up early this year, the leaves that are just starting to tinge yellow. They are trying to tell me something.

Stand there and breathe. Say hi. Say bye. Love it all, just the way it damn well is. 

New Ways To Keep A Diary At 60+

Since teenagerdom I’ve been accumulating an enormous pile of books filled with agonisings, musings and outpourings about my life.

They inhabit the carrier bags of doom, stuffed in the back of a dark cupboard, cowering as the great de-clutter moves ever nearer.

All that scribbling has served me well over the years. The solitary pleasure of sitting up in bed writing frantically, getting it all out of my head and on to the page, has helped stop the merry-go-round of obsessive thoughts and even prompted the occasional decision.

What’s It For?

This year though, the cerise felt-covered book has lost its allure. What is the purpose of all this navel-gazing? Is there a better way to spend my time than writing it all down?

Lately I’ve realised that one reason I write is to put the brakes on time, to preserve experiences by writing them down, and keep them so my life won’t disappear behind me like a vapour trail. It doesn’t really work. Like old photo albums, diaries of the past can only represent a one-dimensional portrait of a moment long-gone.

I might be a lot better off putting my focus on the present moment.

Who Am I Writing For?

Sometimes I do want to look back, and sometimes it’s valuable. Other times it’s sad, like picking at an old wound. And often I end up berating myself, ‘…you really didn’t have a clue in those days, did you…’. Not kind, nor helpful.

I do sometimes imagine Older Me, arriving at a time when nothing new and noteworthy is happening in her life, so she actually wants to curl up with a pile of old diaries and leaf through – ‘Hmm, so I made a beef stew when Jenny and Sean came round in 1978 – no idea who they were…’

Maybe I’m writing them for my children.  Ah yes, the heritage. But a lot of it is such cringeworthy stuff, I’d far rather they burned the lot unopened. They might enjoy the childhood memories, such gems as my daughter’s comment, aged 2, hearing noises off in the supermarket loo saying loudly, ‘I think someone just done a big crap in there…’ – (where did she learn such vulgar language?).

But no. The diaries are crammed with the stuff of a life, large and small, and of interest only to me. And a lot of it not even that interesting.

Different Ways to Keep a Diary

Despite this, I still feel an urge to keep a lighter record, so  I’ve been trying a few things instead of the screed.

  • Draw rather than write. I like stick people and speech balloons.
  • Note one thing heard during the day that was funny, smart, or touching.
  • Sum the day up in one word
  • Pick a random word from a book and use it to spark a quick poem – write for 3 minutes

These are fun, quick and say a lot without the need for three pages of handwriting. If you’re an inveterate diarist, give them a go yourself.

Do you keep a diary? What is its underlying purpose – or does it even need one? Have you tried other ways of recording events in your life? Please share your thoughts below.

SaveSave

SaveSave

SaveSave

SaveSave

SaveSave